Monday, 15 September 2008


I think my mid-life crisis is setting in.

I'm fed up with a lot of things at the moment.

I'm a repeating sufferer of mild depression (or do I just get pissed off? The doc seems to think it's depression, but who knows?) My best beloved is also off work with depression, but he's the languid type, whereas I'm more manic. It doesn't make for a happy household.

I'm developing a second career, but financially I still need to do my day job. I shouldn't complain, it's part time, for the area in which I live and the work that I do, the money's not bad. Plus (and it's a big plus) I've got unofficial flexi time for my second job, but there's a catch. I hate my fucking job!

And, rather stupidly, I've just agreed to go full time for a while! My company has just bought another business and I'm invoved in training. I've done it on the following conditions:
I can take the time in lieu
I can keep my mobile on
If I get any work for the other job, I do it.

All agreed by the boss (it hasn't cost anything, so is automatically a winner - know thy enemy).

It feels as though everything I try doesn't quite work. I'm trying a crochet pattern for gloves, which will eventually be a friend's birthday pressie, as well as an original design, but I'm getting fed up with having to unpick and re-do. I know that this is part of the design process, but I'm frustrated with how rarely I can get it right first time.

My pattern's been put back. No biggie, just a delay.

Rejections are us. I send the requisite three chapters and synopsis to an agent, who rejected. Not surprised but still disappointed. It's a bit like NOT getting the call back from Jim'll Fix It. Interestingly, the work was out of order when it was returned, leading me to assume that it was rejected after five pages. Some writers would be insulted by this (they haven't read the whole thing), but to steal and paraphrase a quote from Jane Wenham-Jones book, they don't need to taste the whole dish to know that it needs more salt.

So, I've moved things around, to introduce an interesting character earlier and to add in a bit of conflict that would otherwise languish until chapter three.

I thank them for their rejection. I would have preferred an acceptance, I would have liked more feedback than the standard letter, but their method of return has taught me something useful and I'm grateful for it.

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