Sad - a family bereavement.

At four o'clock this morning, my Grandfather died. He was 88 years old (a good innings, as they say), and had outlived my Mum (his daughter) by over a year, but I'm still feeling very, very sad.

Grandad was a sentimental man, and for the last year has been very unhappy. I saw him yesterday, and he looked unwell, and exhausted, so it was no great shock, but still a loss. He was scared about going into hospital yesterday, worried that he wouldn't come home and thanks to some internal bleeding and a heart attack, he didn't, but he was comfortable when he died, and with my father and one of my aunts.

There will be a lot of sorting out to do - family politics as well as his belongings, but right now, it's just a time for sadness, reflection, and to think of the happy times with him.

"You can shed tears that he is gone,
Or you can smile because he lived,
You can close your eyes and pray that he will come back,
Or you can open your eyes and see all that he has left.
Your heart can be empty because you can't see him
Or you can be full of the love that you shared,
You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday,
Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.
You can remember him and only that he is gone
Or you can cherish his memory and let it live on,
You can cry and close your mind be empty and turn your back,
Or you can do what he would want: smile, open your eyes,love and go on."